EVERYTHING INDIAN HAS AN “INDIAN ODOR”!

Kuttanlifeissues

THINGS INDIAN HAVE AN “INDIAN” TOUCH/SMELL!

Warming Up:

India the nation remains “pellet-hit” , to use a topically relevant metaphor-but unlike those miscreants in Kashmir that remain hospitalized, our nation invited these ‘pellets’, some of which are rubber and only injure but some have seriously handicapped her people!

This “Indian Touch”—it takes the chalta hai route and never insists on global acceptability and unmatched quality at all– is what prevents us from living world class and turning world class export products! It’s this mindset—which is irrational in ensuring the life and health of her people and practices discrimination– that quietly encourages our stressed laborers to slave away under a cruel master in the Arabian Gulf or elsewhere to support their kith and kin back home!

It pollutes the Indian atmosphere almost wholly in spite of a lay PM’s idealistic Mann Ki Bath or a Bollywood actor’s earnestly conducted “Satyameva…

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EVERYTHING INDIAN HAS AN “INDIAN ODOR”!

THINGS INDIAN HAVE AN “INDIAN” TOUCH/SMELL!

Warming Up:

India the nation remains “pellet-hit” , to use a topically relevant metaphor-but unlike those miscreants in Kashmir that remain hospitalized, our nation invited these ‘pellets’, some of which are rubber and only injure but some have seriously handicapped her people!

This “Indian Touch”—it takes the chalta hai route and never insists on global acceptability and unmatched quality at all– is what prevents us from living world class and turning world class export products! It’s this mindset—which is irrational in ensuring the life and health of her people and practices discrimination– that quietly encourages our stressed laborers to slave away under a cruel master in the Arabian Gulf or elsewhere to support their kith and kin back home!

It pollutes the Indian atmosphere almost wholly in spite of a lay PM’s idealistic Mann Ki Bath or a Bollywood actor’s earnestly conducted “Satyameva Jayathey”! All of us—including the State ministries and PM– are in the full know of our nation’s numerous deficiencies and social evils smothering our people! But we would rather these remain with us to the graver rather than overcome them or fling them away!

The 4 lions on the top of the Ashoka pillar at Sarnath remain undesired and un-appreciated in the same nation where Emperor Ashoka reigned with success and universal goodwill!

Is India that Unique?

As far as my present knowledge of India goes, I think India is neither on Mars nor on Venus but a nation in South Asia on Planet Earth. Thus it has no qualification for claiming to be unique in A to Z ways since any nation tends to share a lot of its geographical and cultural features with its neighbors in the region.

Not that you and I must not love our mother or father land from the bottom of our hearts of course but only that our love for her must be balanced and in no way tending to be jingoist or ultra nationalist since, by behaving like that, we shall be making ourselves buts of ridicule in the eyes of the world.

I do understand that the term “nationalism” has been grossly misunderstood in this country to be intense patriotism, which it’s certainly not according to all known hitherto-published lexicons!!

What Lies Behind that “News”?

Day in and day out our print media come to us with a whole ton of what is known as news (or heavily processed and flavored information).You and I tend, along with my life partner here under my roof, to accept all that is printed as the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth though it may be far from the truth in a lot of respects.

Look behind the captions and rad the news with a critical eye and you are going to get jolted by the sheer abysmal hopelessness for the country reflected in it in a small way!

If the Opposition derives a sadistic joy in blocking the GST Bill (See below), because of its own stymied self-glorification and shelved narcissism, the defamation cases plethora owes their origin to ego and arrogance. The inanity behind the CM having a bunch of fresh expectations of the police—while the police themselves are fully in the know of them- means nothing of course. COTPA linked raids and arrests indicate the effort of the powers that be to homogenize the people of India as to their habits and preferences!

Glancing through today’s newspaper, I see the captions below given in glaring letters in a haphazard manner:

  1. “In a bid to push GST, Jaitley meets Opposition leaders”
  2. “Rahul and Jaitley get steamed up in the House”
  3. “SC shocked by slew of defamation cases in TN”
  4. “Evidence in ISS case goes missing from court.”
  5. “Strings attached to classicism”
  6. “Pinarayi lists his expectations of the police”
  7. “Cigarettes and Other tobacco products Act” (COTPA)

If I were to list all such captions—each of them carrying a story displaying colossal myopia, contemptible inanity, Pacific-vast ignorance, deplorable lack of vision, downright frustration and similar negative feelings on the boil- I could bore you to death with at least 50 such. And every one of them carries with it the classic and unmistakable Indian Touch too!

  • An Indian’s Daily Life:

The typical Indian commoner lives his day out, moving from one confusion and/or uncertainty to another. Even the essentials he needs to survive may not be available within an accessible distance to him or totally inaccessible—but no one reacts or raises his voice! Indians in Free India are still their colonized, demoralized voiceless silently enduring grandparents at home or outdoors!

The social systems that hem him in –and dampen his instinct to think or act creatively–are mostly antiquated and rusted yet they are not allowed to evolve or change for the better though he may know how to do things differently!

Mrs. Grundy here is that strong because Indians in general take more interest in what others are doing than in their own activities, partly because of the caste factor and owing to Faith X or Y being made a tool for pressurizing people to behave in a specific manner! Mohammed Akhlaq was lynched simply because h kept some mutton at home, which the local faith vigilantes used as an excuse to eliminate him! Hindu pressure groups like Sri Ram Sene and Sanathan Samstha transgress laws to prevent our people from being aware of irrationality.

Nuclear families are the norm and they remain relatively rootless in a cultural sense; this also affects the Indian commoner’s life satisfaction!

  • Denials and “Adjustments”:

India is no country for honest people because our life here is marked by having to willingly or otherwise accommodate a lot of dishonesty in the course of the day. The so-called public officials tend to render their specific services only in a quid pro quo manner, in return for a ‘consideration’ and after their palms have been greased well.

It’s an open fact that our roads remain shamefully pitted, potholed and uneven because the funds allocated to the PWD (in charge of roads and public buildings) goes waste because it’s routinely abused and misused on purpose. The amount set apart for repainting any road slides down a long hierarchical pipeline into the private hands of PWD officials and less than 5% reach the contractor concerned.

In the Indian official jargon, these amounts get “adjusted” in cash vouchers so that the State government doesn’t come to know of this crime by Indians against Indian people themselves!

The dowry handed over to the potential groom’s owners—the parents– is another form of adjustment since its unearned unaccounted money extorted by one set of people from another for imaginary reasons! (Is it the price of the groom’s sperm?).

Didn’t you know that in India it’s the parents themselves who behave as the undisputed owners of their children and who vicariously get married through their kids? Anyway, this alone can be the inference you and I reach after going through a typical wedding invite! Even the names of long since dead grandparents are given for ornamentation!

Bribes given to all and sundry even for piffling services are again an adjustment. The appeasement money given to funeral priests for conducting meaningless rituals for the dead are again a bribe of sorts since the amount is clandestine and not taxed.

  • Connived-at Social evils and Crimes:

Apart from how we as a people remain shamefaced with rotten egg on our faces thanks to Thalaikoothal (The TN convention of children killing their own aged parents) or dowry, female infanticide, women trafficking, rapes, cannibalism, murders and molestations, pedophilia and the sexual promiscuity indulged in by many, we Indians are damn good at shutting our eyes against horrible criminal acts too happening anywhere in our land beyond the usual “hi!”  or “OMG”!

You may hear wild arguments like “The husband has the right to exercise domestic violence against their women throw them out at will like soiled used shoes” or “Talaq can’t be banned because it is the man’s privilege” or “Our kids are actually a liability” or “Dowry has justification since it’s the money we need from her family to support the woman all through her life in this home of ours!” or “The female is always subservient to the male according to Manu” etc.(!)

And everyone around nods his head in silent agreement instead of opposing these point by point or by upbraiding the idiot!

If dowry alone got banned in this country, hundreds of girl kids would be alive in North and Northwest India today!

Not only we but even the local police don’t do anything about a man raping, and then murdering local girls in his house and pressure-cooking their flesh for daily consumption! It’s all part of life in India! Or is it?

The cannibal is seized in the wake of popular criticism and then given a trial before being housed in some prison at the tax payer’s expense –and never executed mazzolato-style  in front of his own people as a deterrent for persons intending similar crimes!~

After all, he is also an Indian, isn’t he?

Hundreds of social evils and horrible social conventions encrust our society like barnacles on the submarine rocks!

What are you and I doing about removing them?

NOTHING!

We are Indians, aren’t we? Why must we look into our home mirrors and see for ourselves our numerous facial warts and dark patches?

(To be continued)

 

THE TAKE-HOME “KABAALI” MESSAGE!

Kuttanlifeissues

THE TAKE-HOME MESSAGE FROM “KABALI” FOR INDIA!

Our objective here is NOT to rest content with the film and its storyline as such but to analyze their structure, compare Kabali (hereafter K) with many similar films in Tamil and Hindi and South Indian tongues, and then extend the graph to what can be predicted with near certainty about the Tamil film goer’s mindset.

It would also be a useful exertion on our part to use K to better understand Tamilian psyche in general, find the basis of why retired film artistes—eligible or not– find themselves suddenly elevated to high political positions and so on too!

A don-to-don double deception story hallmarked by false accusations, false witnesses, and bribed judiciary perhaps, and consequent blood sport comprise the basic storyline of this film K too, like many others made in South Indian languages. Such a complexion for the story would whet the…

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THE TAKE-HOME “KABAALI” MESSAGE!

THE TAKE-HOME MESSAGE FROM “KABALI” FOR INDIA!

Our objective here is NOT to rest content with the film and its storyline as such but to analyze their structure, compare Kabali (hereafter K) with many similar films in Tamil and Hindi and South Indian tongues, and then extend the graph to what can be predicted with near certainty about the Tamil film goer’s mindset.

It would also be a useful exertion on our part to use K to better understand Tamilian psyche in general, find the basis of why retired film artistes—eligible or not– find themselves suddenly elevated to high political positions and so on too!

A don-to-don double deception story hallmarked by false accusations, false witnesses, and bribed judiciary perhaps, and consequent blood sport comprise the basic storyline of this film K too, like many others made in South Indian languages. Such a complexion for the story would whet the appetite of any film viewer instantly since in his heart of hearts he is also both infuriated and frustrated with many activities uniquely Indian—like scams galore!

Dozens of films in South Indian languages alone have been already made on this same over-milked theme but it sells because of Rajnikanth being the protagonist, because of special visual effects, and because the story relates to Tamils that migrated in another nation Malaysia! In addition there is plenty of technical bells and whistles for an added flourish! (The Tamils in TN—unlike Malayalis for instance– seek to identify themselves with Tamils living anywhere else too on the planet with scarce respect for international laws and also emotional appreciation for them as such. This was what led to the clandestine help given to LTTE from TN, and Rajiv Gandhi’s assassination. Greater Eelam possibility was too irresistible for Tamils in reality and they fell for this ruse concocted by the late gangster Prabhakaran!)

I have adopted a Zoom-Out technique—i.e. From the specific instance to the generally applicable one– here for a change from the Zoom-In technique I mostly make use of in such blogs and also because through this approach we can use the K storyline to learn a few things about how a Tamil would think habitually and also how he or she would respond to what you or I might say!

The film’s story line is simple enough—with a clear protagonist and a clear-cut villain. Both have their henchmen and myrmidons too. In tune with what the film goes in TN would expect there is enough sound and fury and the ka-boom of explosions, the sound of gunshots from a gun with a silencer attached and lightning fast body extensor movements.

Plot:

A Kuala Lumpur-based don Kabaleeswaran alias Kabali (Rajinikanth) is released after spending 25 years in prison on a false charge of starting a massacre at a local Hindu temple that killed many, including his wife Kumudhavalli alias Kumudha (Radhika Apte).

He immediately resumes charge of his old gang and soon confronts Loganathan alias Loga (Mime Gopi), a drug smuggler. Loga insults Kumudha, saying that she would have been sold into prostitution had she been alive. In retaliation, Kabali rams his car into Loga, killing him; however, the incident makes Kabali believe that his wife may be still alive.

Later that night, Kabali survives an assassination attempt by Tamizh Kumaran alias Kumaran (Kalaiyarasan), whose father Tamilmaaran (Charles Vinoth) was killed by Kabali when he was a young boy. The next day, at a function organized by the Free Life Foundation School, a school started by Kabali’s friend Ameer (John Vijay) to reform youngsters involved in criminal activities, Kabali talks about his past.

Kabali was the protégé of Tamilmaaran’s father Tamilnesan (Nassar), a don who fought for the rights of the Tamil Malaysians. Tamilnesan was killed by Veerasekaran alias Veera (Kishore), who was also a part of Tamilnesan’s gang, but disliked his rules such as not involving in illegal activities like drug smuggling and prostitution.

Following Tamilnesan’s death, Kabali took charge of his gang. However, Veera manipulated Tamilmaaran by telling him that he, being Tamilnesan’s son, should lead the gang and not Kabali.

Tamilmaaran invited Kabali and a pregnant Kumudha for a temple function. However, this was revealed to be a trap as Veera and his men confronted Kabali and Kumudha. In the ensuing scuffle, Kabali was brutally attacked while Kumudha was shot and seemingly killed. Kabali then killed Tamilmaaran for his betrayal in front of a young Kumaran and was soon arrested on a false charge of instigating the massacre.

Kumaran, after hearing Kabali’s speech, realizes his mistake and apologizes to Kabali. He tells him that Velu, one of Veera’s henchmen who had shot Kumudha, is aware that Kumudha is still alive and had given birth to a baby girl after the massacre.

Kabali then leaves for Thailand, where Velu is residing. On confronting Velu, he learns that his daughter is still alive. At this juncture, Kabali is confronted by Yogi (Dhansika), a contract killer hired by Veera and his boss Tony (Winston Chao), who heads the rival Gang 43 in Kuala Lumpur, to eliminate Kabali.

But Yogi instead kills the men who had come with her and reveals herself to Kabali as his daughter, who had been raised by Velu. She also tells him that Kumudha is still alive and is living with a French family in Puducherry, India.

Kabali and Yogi then leave for Puducherry, where they reunite with Kumudha and spend a few days with her there.

Kabali and his family soon return to Kuala Lumpur, where Kabali is told that Ameer has been severely injured in a car accident set up by Tony; his henchman Jeeva (Dinesh) was brutally chopped to pieces by Tony after refusing to join the Gang 43; and the Gang 43 has started to control the Kuala Lumpur underworld, eliminating any gang who dared to oppose them.

On hearing all this, Kabali decides to finish Tony and Veera once and for all. He and his family attend a birthday party for a respected Malaysian don, who had invited all gangs, including the Gang 43. At the party, Kabali starts a shootout with the help of Kumaran, which ends with him killing Veera and Tony.

Some months later, Kabali attends a function organized by the Free Life Foundation. One of the Free Life alumni, a youngster name Tiger (‘Johnny’ Hari), who is known to be aggressive and reckless, walks up to Kabali, with scenes showing him speaking to the police prior to the function.

The screen cuts to black, and the sound of a gun clicking and a gunshot afterwards is heard.”

(From Wikipedia English)

The storyline of the film as you have noticed contains in liberal proportions all the win-win ingredients—a revenge story theme, refined sex charm, fine songs, unilateral violence, nostalgia triggers, action contexts etc. in a nice mix. If K earned over Rs 105 crores on the very first day itself, its then no surprise, but what stands out as really incredible is the protagonist’s performance as Kabali despite his actual septuagenarian age and predictable debility.

ANALYSIS (Story):

Now let’s coolly and dispassionately analyze the feasibility and credibility of such a story happening anywhere, and how the story proves itself to be fantasy of a kind—a Tamil fairy tale meant for adults– on analysis.

Kodambakkam (TN’s film production center) has done a lot of films in Tamil on gangsters. The cast of characters here in K too has been done rather intelligently what with the villain and his associates being in the ascendant at the start and then facing their deserved comeuppance later at Kabali’s hands.

The Psychology:

Any Indian audience, inwardly seething with rage at many issues uniquely shameful and also Indian, would lap up all the gory blood sport display! The psychology of the typical Indian viewer of any film in an Indian language based on initial injustice and then pay-back action is easy to understand—for him , the film is one way of obtaining some sort of visible justice for sins committed against people like him by unknown forces in the past!

The Indian commoners has lots of personal and collective grievances to live with day and night thanks to his observation of inefficient ministries, unpunctual ministers and people representatives, meaningless election exercise, inaccessibility of even creature comforts like power or water,  over riding corruption in almost all transactions entered into, clogged PDS, inflation, and so on.

He loves to forget it all in film viewing for a change and laugh at times too in the theater, if not at home! The quantum of evil presented is immaterial since the quantum of retributive justice meted out by the film’s protagonist promises to be equally terrible. For the Indian viewer this is Nirvana of sorts!

Double crossing and Judas behavior pattern is standard with all gangster films; shootouts and blood-spilling by novel means are also commonplace are also far more common than we imagine.

The revenge that Kabali feels has been given a solid basis, thereby justifying it in all its horror. Viewers across the caste/community/faith/age spectrum respond readily to the need of the aggrieved party—Kabali in this case– to pay back for his undeserved punishment.

The VFX –special effects- add to the charm of the production.

The Credibility Rating of the base story is low but with all the usual pyrotechnics, the comic relief and Rajni mannerisms, the film manages to leave behind a sweet after taste.

The Rajni Factor:

As far as the TN viewers are concerned, this lack of credibility takes a back seat so long as the film has Rajni as its protagonist! His acting the role out has its own unique style and his mannerisms stick with Tamils anywhere too.

Rajnikanth is a veteran cut out for acting almost naturally, but he has his personal idiosyncrasies too, which Tamil viewers swear by. Over spicing and over flavoring is standard in all Tamil action movies, Rajni films included. And Indian viewers are not at all against this practice too!

Who, except rank idiots, expects the film to be a reality show when he is seeking in his way to escape from real hassles all around him and is expecting to be transported to a fantasy realm for a span of 3 hours or more?

No wonder he is a superstar with a million fans licking his footprints. The Rajni Factor is what ensures success in any Tamil film and particularly in revenge based story lines.

We shall take up the probable influence of this story and film on Indian society in general and on Tamil society in particular we shall take up later!

“VERBOTEN FUR KINDER”!

Kuttanlifeissues

VERBOTEN fur KINDER!

Taking to Kids? Or feel like Turning away from Them?

Let’s be honest with our own adult selves; we have been at times infuriated when the kid seated next to us , say on a train or on a plan started throwing his tantrums though we have ,if only for courtesy’s sake , endured his antics. Most of us like not only to keep away from kids as kids and often desire they were well mannered adults instead—and also keep kids of any kind as far away from us and from our gadgets as we can!

In this queer nation, where our daily life is never linear or smooth but a tarantella dance of sorts among many confusions and uncertainties, our likes and dislikes are mostly conditioned by other extraneous factors like faith and caste too.

Thus kids born here have all the dice loaded against them…

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“VERBOTEN FUR KINDER”!

VERBOTEN fur KINDER!

Taking to Kids? Or feel like Turning away from Them?

Let’s be honest with our own adult selves; we have been at times infuriated when the kid seated next to us , say on a train or on a plan started throwing his tantrums though we have ,if only for courtesy’s sake , endured his antics. Most of us like not only to keep away from kids as kids and often desire they were well mannered adults instead—and also keep kids of any kind as far away from us and from our gadgets as we can!

In this queer nation, where our daily life is never linear or smooth but a tarantella dance of sorts among many confusions and uncertainties, our likes and dislikes are mostly conditioned by other extraneous factors like faith and caste too.

Thus kids born here have all the dice loaded against them from their birth onwards in our society: only those that get quietly killed escape the intolerant adult looks, xenophobic stares and painfully biting verbal accusations and also the discrimination-saturated air that you and I breathe.

Many fine dining restaurants/hotels in India have a standing policy in this regard: “CHILDREN NOT WELCOME!” The managements of such food outlets believe that families bringing in their kids are positively a nuisance to other diners in the hall or room. Of course, and without a doubt, this is a mere extension of the intense discrimination you and I have been born into and brought up in –and which we take for an accepted fact here in India.

I bet that less than 1% among us instinctively take to kids of any description, from anywhere, in a free and under- no-obligation style—as I do! (And I do so partly because I give higher priority to basic human goodness towards others across barriers and probably because I have gone abroad and rendered teaching and interpretation services in the poorest villages of Ethiopia in Africa and the Yemen desert!)

The Opponents in this Battle

Come on, lets’ keep our eyes and  ears open to the opinions our parents have about this policy before you and I set about thrashing it out as an issue insulting to the imperative for acknowledging the human rights of children.

Says Ms. Rashmi Singh, a sophisticated mother of two, “I love kids but I think there is nothing wrong in basing children of a certain age after a particular time, in a restaurant. The restaurants …are simply thinking about the well being of their patrons. Think about it: you are having a romantic candle lit dinner with your lover and amidst an intimate tete-e-tete or conversation, and suddenly, you hear a child shrieking away at a high decibel for God knows why. Won’t it be a mood spoiler?

So that’s it in her eyes: children spoil the romantic moods of adults! She feels that fine dining restaurants are not having any kid friendly menu too. Her suggestion is that such parents with kids of their own must avoid restaurants altogether and instead ought to go ONLY to places that are child friendly like museums and parks!

(Be assured I have something to say about such “Merely Biological Moms” but later! Please be patient!)

Another mother, who happens to be a jewelry designer, says that she doesn’t want to force prim and proper behavior out of her children or curb their natural enthusiasm. “No one is going to like a child yelling, ”Mom I’ve lost my shoe” at the top of his voice” says she and adds that this No Kids policy indicates the hotel owner’s respect for their patron’s desire for some privacy and for spending a quiet evening in appetite-boosting silence surrounded by flavors of all kinds!

One gets to read, on the contrary, as follows in a blog by Mansi Zaveri,

” I think it’s an unfair practice. Most people according to her live in nuclear families and it’s not always feasible to leave young children safely at home alone or drop them off at grandparents’ home every time the dad and mom feel like having food together at a restaurant.

It’s inconvenient for everyone involved” she adds knowingly,” If for instance it’s my birthday I’d like to eat at a nice fine dining restaurant  and naturally ,as a mother, wouldn’t want to celebrate without my kid. Also I believe that children must be familiarized with different cuisines at a young age and be exposed socially too to learn how to conduct themselves in any public place.”

What she suggests is that hotel managements must reserve separate places as child friendly zones for families bringing in their kids!

Another parent courteously suggests that parents with kids go ONLY to up-market hotels where there are persons that keep the kids well entertained and from throwing tantrums!(How many urban parents can afford to foot the computer- generated bills served at customers at such places please?) .

So there you have it: the Mahabharatha Battle fought bitterly all through the year on the same turf by adults among themselves for and against children as a people category!

I don’t wish to dilate on this invisible confrontation phenomenon ad nauseam of course, dear friends, and so I shall get down without any Walter Raleigh flourish to analyzing the basic psychology at work here!

Most kids are born by accident, and are thus entirely unplanned or eagerly anticipated by their biological parents. As a consequence they—or at least one partner- tends to view the kids as an unnecessary intrusion of sorts that has to be endured to keep the marital pretense going!

The early summer of June-July—the honeymoon season when NOTHING can be planned and Murphy’s Law is the hallmark– does the trick in the West since most weddings take place in early June. To add insult to injury most men and many women are totally career-oriented too, especially in an urban milieu. A baby demanding 24/7 attention and extra care is a threat to such couples too. So they never strain individually to do justly by the kid!

Speaking of the worries of hotel and restaurant managements, admit it that running a hotel or restaurant to the expectations of customers and clients anywhere is far from an easy activity: this is because human omission or commission issues start surfacing as soon as the hotel opens for business—and unceasingly from day to day.

The customer profile has also changed vastly in the years immediately behind us.

But there is basic issue here.

What is a restaurant? Why is it set up at all please? Is it only for pleasing adult customers and eliciting money from them in exchange for food or drink served,  and probably also  for minor services OR for offering an unforgettable experience in satisfaction and joy to all human beings  so long as they come in with hunger or thirst or for accommodation for a few nights?

What is a hotel’s role please? Is it to help boost romantic feelings between jaded couples on some days a month when they feel like having “it” or for making them feel that they are a wonderful nuclear family unit?

If so, isn’t it imperative that hotels not only accept households having kids also along with their parents come in freely but also view the children as enough reasons for bringing in further business-cum-service to parents? Isn’t it their bounden duty to keep the kids happy, contented and well entertained?

Isn’t it necessary to train all hotel employees in this entertainment-generation skill also if the hotel is to be successful in the long run as a service-provider within the society?

If all cruise liners have such persons in situ and playing all kinds f riles to keep the kids happy, how come hotel managements are shying away from this need?

Mustn’t the national governments insist on their having such person also within their workforce at all times so as to be able to perfectly accommodate families gifted with children of their own?

Shouldn’t even the General Manager be willing to take up a clown’s or story teller’s or dancer’s role at times if needed?

Kid-distancing Parents

Believe it or not, I was always kept, as a school boy, at a distance of about 4 feet away from my late Dad at all times and he preferred it that way too. He would visit our home once a year from some distant location and stay for a month or so in his room. Before he took his leave he would call each of us kids and gift us some new knickers or shirt. Most parents behaved in this manner in those days and all kids were habituated to such behavior too. Love had nothing to do with it actually.

Hierarchy reigns in many homes and within families too when kids are kept decidedly at a distance by their own parents as a kind of nuisance or as something that challenges and disturbs the parents sense of own authority and superiority!

The kids in such families tend to grow up without any smile in their hearts and souls, as it were, and feel diffident in interaction with others outside the family circle!

If girls by gender, they end up as liabilities at some family and as stupid failed moms or if born male, they become cruel classic MCPs , hopelessly paranoid and suspicious of their own wives and children!

May God keep your and my children away from such a prospect!