HELP YOUR KID FIRST TO CHASE HIS/HER LIFE DREAM! 4/TADn-27RXqZit-04PaNyAyKKijAwp1JNT0BjmbsULRzLLT1eolMsZB //pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({ google_ad_client: “ca-pub-4174891051220599”, enable_page_level_ads: true }); Introduction: An Indian home maker can be a bit carefree only at times if at all, and she needs to start on a Penance Route once she takes a decision to become a mother! DINK (Double Income No Kid) households in our metros –It seems to be a fad–are lucky in this respect since they have no kid to worry about. But if you wish to be a mother-and a mother with a wonderful boy or girl kid of your own, you need to undergo some penance. This comprises not only a modified diet but also some daily exercise to pep up your hormonal machinery inside, make the musculature flexible enough, and stimulate timely ovulation! The physicians in your group are free to correct my use of the term “penance” but be assured I use it after some solid research on prevention of ADHD and Autism too. And once your kid gets born, you as a home maker in some nook of the world, have your hands full in every sense of the term. God gave you 9 months and so many days for adequate preparation in advance to do justice to this new guest within your family fold. If you have used that time sensibly you would have read upon this most magical process aka gestation or pregnancy and the added bonus miracle of childbirth! Now you have barely 15 years ahead to do your most important job in life-that of grooming your kid into a good citizen, no matter the gender! Make the smallest slip and your kid shall suffer to that extent. Lead a high on the hog lifestyle in neglect of your kids and they cause you numerous headaches. All your intellectual faculties are called for, plus all the knowledge you have of the human body and its language! (a) NEVER mold your kid into a poodle! Poodles, by definition, are small pet dogs taken along by wealthy women abroad and over-fondled by them as good companions. It’s an open secret that some kids at school hail from wealthy families and have facilities and gadgets that others may not have. Any non-uniformity in dress, or facilities being enjoyed makes for a sense of discrimination against such kids among others; they tend to look at him or her as a member of a weird cult of some kind. To some extent this has been addressed by school managements by insisting on a school uniform, but even then this remains a fact. Within the lucky kid, this superiority makes for a feeling of contempt for the less lucky in his classroom. Both these are unhealthy tendencies. As a parent you must never nurture your kid into one such pet poodle. Just tell him he is like other kids to you. Tell him if you can’t facilitate something for him in tune with his desire. Be honest, and remain in the KNOW at all times. (b) Using the Retailing Strategy to persuade! Online retailing strategy, far more in percentage than offline today, rely on repeated exposure to a desired product or service till the potential customer arrives at his or her Delta Moment-the zero–indecision moment of deciding to buy! Offline you may be passionately persuaded by some pretty young woman to buy the product or item immediately because of some freebie or linked offer such as talk time on your smartphone. Omni channel retailing has also arrived abroad in a big way. Persuasion is key to helping you adopt a stance. This same strategy can be adopted by any mother/ father to bring round a kid to a career move, partner choice or relocation decision. Invite your kid to a chat session with an affectionate smile of welcome. Put your hands on the shoulder of the kid and talk to her earnestly and sincerely about the plus points of what you are about to say. Ignore the minus points if any. Give him/her the conviction he or she so badly needs; convince him that it’s a good value proposition that you are enlightening him or her about. List the benefits he can get thereby too. Emphasize the conveniences that comes along with it. Dilate to him/her the future prospects of the position. Tyrannical parents are an extinct generation today. The more intimate you are to your own kids the less is the chance of their dumping you at some Old Age Home later. Issuing orders and roaring to the kid is so blasé! No kid likes it. And he/she shall have the rancor left even after he or she abides by your decision. NCRB data confirm that most parentally forced weddings have fallen on hard times early and most –>80% – have failed across the years. TRY TO BE SUCH A GOOD DAD OR MOM THAT YOUR KID CANNOT FEEL HAPPY WITHOUT YOU! (c) Immunize him against Obsession with religion : Ideologies of any kind tend to divide people into goats and sheep as it were. Dreams and anguish bring us together. I recall a Catholic dad declaring that he would give his daughter in marriage to even a benighted Hottentot or Black but not to a Protestant guy. Also I remember mothers threatening to kill themselves if their sons married from among the Hindus or Muslims. Such strong reactions and threats emanate from one having a faith ID of some kind, to the rejection and exclusion of all others. This world’s religions have triggered terrible inhuman battles and wars and many innocent kids have been ‘honor-killed by their own parents –like that unlucky Aarushi Talwar?–also in this country for this reason. Many religions profess that everyday life is some prison and afterlife is the only silver lining on life’s dark cloud. This is NOT true at all. Tell your kid about faiths being personally held routes to a Godhead concept—the embodiment of goodness. Then tell him about the religious machinery that got attached to these faiths for community support. Tell him that every faith contains some good points anyway and it’s the religious machinery that tends to turn often against man. (d) Let the Past remain dead. Most Indians have this ingrained bias to ‘live’ in the distant past for various reasons. Most Hindus have this addiction to past ways, past tradition, past conventions, past rituals and past notions. Thank God they refuse to dress themselves the way their forefathers did. They love to refer again and again to their great grandparents, grandparents and dead parents as if they matter more in the lives of these persons than those souls might have thought at any time! One reason for this needless addiction is that they’d love to be free from pain, sorrows, worries and problems that they cannot escape from and are eyeball to eyeball with in real life at the moment. Let the Past remain in its own grave! Look to your future and live in the present-the vibrant happening Present. Thoughts of either Past or future are no more solid than a dream. Tell your kid wonderful stories or read poems aloud to him too but also tell him that these got written long, long ago, that the world has changed almost beyond recognition today and that he or she must learn to live in the present. In India this kind of training to unlearn the Past almost totally to set a goal for the future is all the more imperative. Tell him that the past is dead and that all human beings die off after a while. Once they come to know of the impermanence of life, they get to be truly open and willing to see the future as fast approaching them. Getting your kid de-linked from such needless addictions to bygone days is the sure shot technique to giving him or her a golden future that you may be alive to share. (e) Familiarize him to a variety of foods! Ever heard of the Tamilian delicacy known as Kambu Kuzhi Paniyaram? It is a vegetarian dish made from Pearl Millet, Idli rice (Pounded rice batter) and Urad dhal (Black gram). Well, I had a taste of it quite recently and loved it for its taste all right but my close relative, who is a physician, feared he would be allergic to it. How do food allergies develop at all in a kid? Simple! He or she has not been familiarized with that food item before touching his /her 6th birthday! Many parents make this grievous mistake, owing to silly prejudices and baseless notions about what to eat and what is forbidden by the Big Brother-like “tradition”. And their kids pay dearly for their mother’s ignorance or dad’s lapse. As a parent you owe it to your own self to empower your kid to live anywhere in the world and consume any dish available. By not allowing him this humanitarian grace, you are denying him or her normal life at a different location from your own familiar environs! You may have heard of Vindaloo Visas granted by UK? This is a tasty chicken based delicacy but only Indian cooks are good at making it well .The visa refers to them. Incidentally, there is a sea of misunderstanding regarding when to wean kids away from breast milk. In my eye a kid about a year old can begin on simple egg dishes and progress to chicken and other meat varieties if he is being groomed for an athletic career. I take it, dear parent, that your aim in bringing the kid up is NOT to end him or her up as a poor office clerk! We shall touch upon some other relevant areas in my next blog! Bye!

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